He expired before I came here in 2000. I met him before I left Baroda in 1977.
He was one of three brother in laws. I respected him most.
His well meaning face was very transparent with feelings. He had giving-nature and a fresh outlook of the world. He was conservative family man. He always cut his coat according to his cloth.
Here are some incidents and words I remember.
I married Joya when Chandra, made it happen. She talked to Ma. Ma could never let Chandra disappoint. Ma asked her how was her co-sister-in-law, Joy's sister. Chandra said there was nothing wrong with her.
Later Amuda told me Joya's family would not let any eligible bachelor pass by without a girl tied. Chandra did not discuss my marriage with me since I was not concerned. I assumed support from whomever I married.
When Joya was pregnant, Amuda advised me saying that Girls go mad after pregnancy, take care!
What I loved most about Amuda is his correctness and practical outlook.
My world collapsed when I heard from ma that Joya's sister in law had died. Joya and Zinia were still there in Agartala. I wanted them back as soon as possible. Zinia was only one year old. They did not come to Kolkata with Chhordi. Instead Satyada came for some training in Delhi as pleader for my sisters correctness. Chhordi spread the rumor of her death. She was only five minutes walk from Joya's home.
I was sick and recovering at Chandra's flat. Courtesy Amuda.
I did several things. when I found out that Joya had more concern for her family and brother than me. I resigned from job and started looking for new job and consulting assignment. I had a hope of getting an assignment from my past employer. He did come back with an assignment that was for 120k. It was good but then I did not take it. I asked for 150k. Conflict with Joya was in the increase. She was abusing me and my family on daily basis. I was not in a position to take any job with constant conflict at home. I was down with chickenpox and remained in bed for 2 months. My only support was then my landlord. He promised me his support no matter what. I was grateful to him.
Amuda gave a lead of one person and asked me to meet him. I made an appointment with this person. I was very surprised. Apparently he heard I went insane. Perhaps it was true. If I am insane I have to bear my insanity. But I was very angry with Amuda, I cannot support my family with this kind of support. I wrote a letter to his office address asking him not to come to my place any more. In the evening Chandra came and said many things. She said that such shocking letter could cause heart attack to Amuda. She did not realize what I going through and what I must do. Without anybody's support, Joya not supporting, currently without job - I did not need an employer where I had to prove my sanity. I kept mum all through the turbulence and I wished that they leave me alone. They departed but Amuda came back few minutes after alone and said, it was not him who did this.
I loved his honesty and correctness. His intention was genuine.
I do not blame anybody to this day for all the bad that has happened to me. I was being constructed by divinity to have faith in me and me alone and nobody else.
Amuda with his limited earning and life expectation did whatever he could do for his family without words or resorting to dishonesty. He was very concerned about Ayan education and Chandra's health. He did what he could. He also did all the improvements for his flat. He used to live in a room he added to the flat. It was sunny.
In one summer afternoon, I came to meet Chandra. I was talking to Chandra about Sejomama, my hero. My last meeting with him before his death. He came to meet ma. He was blind but never took any support from stick or anybody. He traveled from Madhupur to Jadavpur. His bid farewell to his brother's family. His came to bid farewell to my mother at Baranagar. I found his legs were swollen. I knew this sign. I had seen this before my Thakuma died. While I was telling my story Amuda entered. Chandra said something. Slowly Amuda put his legs on the center table after sitting down.
I respected Amuda more than other two brother in laws of mine. Both were incorrect and supported their spouse dishonesty and lies. Amuda supported his family but did not compromise his self.
The other words from him, I remember:
Nandada sacrificed his life for his family.
What more can we do for our family? What is left to be given?
You may be married for life yet would not know your spouse.
He was one of three brother in laws. I respected him most.
His well meaning face was very transparent with feelings. He had giving-nature and a fresh outlook of the world. He was conservative family man. He always cut his coat according to his cloth.
Here are some incidents and words I remember.
I married Joya when Chandra, made it happen. She talked to Ma. Ma could never let Chandra disappoint. Ma asked her how was her co-sister-in-law, Joy's sister. Chandra said there was nothing wrong with her.
Later Amuda told me Joya's family would not let any eligible bachelor pass by without a girl tied. Chandra did not discuss my marriage with me since I was not concerned. I assumed support from whomever I married.
When Joya was pregnant, Amuda advised me saying that Girls go mad after pregnancy, take care!
What I loved most about Amuda is his correctness and practical outlook.
My world collapsed when I heard from ma that Joya's sister in law had died. Joya and Zinia were still there in Agartala. I wanted them back as soon as possible. Zinia was only one year old. They did not come to Kolkata with Chhordi. Instead Satyada came for some training in Delhi as pleader for my sisters correctness. Chhordi spread the rumor of her death. She was only five minutes walk from Joya's home.
I was sick and recovering at Chandra's flat. Courtesy Amuda.
I did several things. when I found out that Joya had more concern for her family and brother than me. I resigned from job and started looking for new job and consulting assignment. I had a hope of getting an assignment from my past employer. He did come back with an assignment that was for 120k. It was good but then I did not take it. I asked for 150k. Conflict with Joya was in the increase. She was abusing me and my family on daily basis. I was not in a position to take any job with constant conflict at home. I was down with chickenpox and remained in bed for 2 months. My only support was then my landlord. He promised me his support no matter what. I was grateful to him.
Amuda gave a lead of one person and asked me to meet him. I made an appointment with this person. I was very surprised. Apparently he heard I went insane. Perhaps it was true. If I am insane I have to bear my insanity. But I was very angry with Amuda, I cannot support my family with this kind of support. I wrote a letter to his office address asking him not to come to my place any more. In the evening Chandra came and said many things. She said that such shocking letter could cause heart attack to Amuda. She did not realize what I going through and what I must do. Without anybody's support, Joya not supporting, currently without job - I did not need an employer where I had to prove my sanity. I kept mum all through the turbulence and I wished that they leave me alone. They departed but Amuda came back few minutes after alone and said, it was not him who did this.
I loved his honesty and correctness. His intention was genuine.
I do not blame anybody to this day for all the bad that has happened to me. I was being constructed by divinity to have faith in me and me alone and nobody else.
Amuda with his limited earning and life expectation did whatever he could do for his family without words or resorting to dishonesty. He was very concerned about Ayan education and Chandra's health. He did what he could. He also did all the improvements for his flat. He used to live in a room he added to the flat. It was sunny.
In one summer afternoon, I came to meet Chandra. I was talking to Chandra about Sejomama, my hero. My last meeting with him before his death. He came to meet ma. He was blind but never took any support from stick or anybody. He traveled from Madhupur to Jadavpur. His bid farewell to his brother's family. His came to bid farewell to my mother at Baranagar. I found his legs were swollen. I knew this sign. I had seen this before my Thakuma died. While I was telling my story Amuda entered. Chandra said something. Slowly Amuda put his legs on the center table after sitting down.
I respected Amuda more than other two brother in laws of mine. Both were incorrect and supported their spouse dishonesty and lies. Amuda supported his family but did not compromise his self.
The other words from him, I remember:
Nandada sacrificed his life for his family.
What more can we do for our family? What is left to be given?
You may be married for life yet would not know your spouse.
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